You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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