she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
