Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
