Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Randomize
