i can't believe i had my finger in that
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
3 2 1 whiskey
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
