He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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