Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
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