too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
