GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
