I'm jealous of your bromance
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
