ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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