So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
