what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
