3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
