I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
