hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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