? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
