My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize
