I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
