Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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