If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
