piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Randomize
