I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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