I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
