Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
he was CRYING into my vagina
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Randomize
