whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
