is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
