return my video game
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Randomize
