Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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