no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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