when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
