I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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