Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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