I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize