im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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