how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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