Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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