Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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