i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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