just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
We need to feng shui this bitch.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
