Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize