You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
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