talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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