Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
