hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Randomize
