I'm going to jail i love you
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize
