you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
