I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
