wake up i wanna do it froggy style
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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