yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
